Today is my 3rd wedding anniversary, actually! Here's our wedding featured on Offbeat Bride if anyone is interested. We had a superhero/comic book inspired wedding.
I reiterate what people said before-figure out what is most important to you, and put your money toward that. Don't pay attention to rules you think you're supposed to follow. If you don't want to do a bouquet toss, don't do it. If you don't want first dances or cake cutting or whatever, don't do anything you don't want to just because people tell you you're supposed to. Do what makes you happy and comfortable. We had a lot of push back from our families who didn't like our invitations or our theme or whatever because it wasn't "traditional", and I really did let it get to me. The best advice is do what makes you happy and don't care what other people think.
We invited more people than we budgeted for, not for gifts reasons (tacky!), but because we knew people wouldn't show up. It worked well for us, we invited 200 and only around 150 showed, so that was perfect.
I definitely recommend a day of coordinator. I am an actor, so I just used a stage manager, but it really helped to take the stress off me. I had made her a big book of everything I wanted to happen on the day (how the tables were decorated, etc etc) and she just made it happen. So, if you have a super organized friend, I recommend using one!